tastes like burning

8:03pm
firehazard just did which of the following:

a) shorted out apartment by leaving blowdryer running in sink
b) set own eyebrows on fire while stir-frying egg jam*
c) fused rice into a diamond-like carbon product into bottom of saucepan
d) all of the above

(hint: when in doubt, choose c.)

i apologize for the smell, she quietly explained to flatman later. w distracted me.

oh. if, by 'distracting her,' she meant that she came over to my desk on the other end of the apartment to interrupt me as i worked (to tell me for the eleventeenth time how intent she is on living here – OK I GET IT, do you need a pat on the head?) before shuffling back to the kitchen, then gosh, i guess i did distract her. but instead of apologizing, what did i do? i laughed inside, despairingly.

instant karma is getting me, though. today i fished a slobbery tennis ball out from under the kitchen island for her dog and whacked my head on the granite countertop on the way up. so if i sound extra cranky, it's because i concussed myself. or maybe that was her fault because she distracted me without actually being here.

yep, still going to hell.


* don't ask.